Talking about Cancer in a new way

I want to say cancer
A thousand times
A million times
Until I am sick of hearing myself say it
I want to take the bite out of is
That thinest edge of fear
That may never go away
And yet cancer right now feels like something so different
I feel enboldened by it
Cancer has given me something
Something good that has been working
in me for sometime now.
Renewed hope and faith
In all kinds of wierd and wonderful ways
In the beginning I said "cancer is a blessing" as some hope to hold onto
Because the only faith I had was to put one foot in front of the other
That I would somehow get through this
Having no clue how
So I found myself returning to my roots
my spiritual roots
And with the help of friends
Finding good ways to nourish my roots
Working hard
Through meditation and commitment to find me
And love me again
And now I find that those roots are stronger
And my tree of life stronger for the roots I have sent down deep in the earth
So that Cancer has become a strength in me
I want to talk about cancer in a new way
for the courage it now gives me to do new things
To dare to become the person I see for me
Now you will say "Cancer hasn't done this......but rather your experience with cancer"
And I would say "semantics!"
Having Cancer has been the catalyst
In coming through
Right now I am happier then I have been in a long time
I am slowly building something new for myself
A way I want to be in my community
With my friends
I have the feeling that life is again opening like a flower before me
The petals being the supportive lessons I have learned
And all the love I received from friends
I want to tell you that cancer has helped me
To hug longer
Do touch base calls to friends
I want to share the joy in heart
including the deep tears of gratitude
When the voice can't speak
I try to speak up more so my voice is heard
I am focused on making me happy
And in small ways helping others
My life flows out of sacred space a claim every day
The space of quieting the mind and listening to my breath
I want to be with people more and to break my isolation
It seems the more joy I feel the more Joy I find
While life is back to some kind of normal
It looks fresh and uncluttered
There are hurdles to come
And anniversaries to get through
And maybe the twinge of fear keeps me honest
Or going
Reminding always to stay focused on what is important
And to let the other things go