I have been thinking about writing this post for a while - about what got me through my battle with this cancer, what I learned, and now the hope for moving forward. This may take a few posts. In some way it is a summing up - but not entirely since this story is still unfolding.
I really want to start with what got me through this recent journey -
Friends and family - first and formost! I know I have said this to many of you personally - but I couldn't have gotten through this without you. You took me as I was and am, loved me, supported me, gave me shoulders to cry on, peoople to call when things seemed so desperate. You held my hand and listened to me when I was scared. You went to doctors appointments and held my hand when the needles came. I have so much more support and love then I ever dreamed of and I am so happily surprised by everyone of you who have been there for me. I am unimaginably touched that all my brothers and sisters wanted to be with me on my day of surgery - that meant so much to me. It has brought me closer to all of you in some way - and I am so grateful for that. I feel more like a sister then every before! I hope that when any of you need help I will be able to help you out in some way and that you will me know when you need help.
So, I learned from this to reach out - to let people know, as best as I could and was comfortable doing - what was going on and that I needed help. I learned to be a little more transparent and honest with others and even myself.
I have also learned to speak up more, especially about what I want or need without apology. It may not have always worked out that I got all those things met as I wanted, but I spoke up for myself and that is an important lesson for me to carry forward.
Tomorrow I will take up another lesson learned....
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