Yup! it is that since my surgery. And I am back to life before I knew what a GIST was - well almost. Maybe this is the let down after a good fight. The elation is over, the euphoria of coming through okay is gone. Regular life returns and it seems horribly dull and rather disappointing.
This doesn't mean I am not working on those things that I said I wanted to do post-surgery - I am. I am helping another women who is fighting lung cancer, I visit with her at Hope Lodge here in the city. And I am working with a friend who will help me find my everyday passion again, to help me find ways to give back and pay it forward (I might volunteer at Hope Lodge) as well as help me plan some for the future I want to be in for myself. It just feels now, so ordinary.
Maybe my not chatting so much here is another indication of the ordinary life returning. I don't feel the burning need to talk about things quite so much now. I keep reminding myself of the lesson I have learned - keep reaching out to people, take things a day at a time or a step at a time, take time to take care of myself, speak up when I need something, the importance to keep my creativity alive everyday, and to not worry so much - laugh everyday(I am working on this one!)
One thing I can say is it does feel good not to feel so emotional all the time - this is one area of quiet I like.
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